“You suffer from severe depression, severe anxiety, attention deficit disorder, and obsessive-compulsive disorder.” Dr Linda said. She had run me through a series of tests and scenarios, and this was what the data had concluded. “You’re like a flamingo. On the surface, you come across quite calm and in control, but beneath the water, you are kicking for your life”, she said. I had no idea how to react. A part of me felt like rejoicing. Not because of the fatal cocktail of disorders, but because I finally knew what was wrong with me. Before that I had been drowning blindly in dark waters, unaware of the dangers circling in on me, but now I could see. I finally knew who the enemies were. The other part of me was destroyed, angry and empty. I felt like a leper.”
The above is an extract from Tshegofatso Sephula’s debut book, Mental Decay. SAFMH Project Leader: Advocacy and Awareness, Michel’le Donnelly, recently caught up with Tshegofatso who shared his mental health journey with her.
PLEASE NOTE: this interview deals with potentially-triggering subject matter, so please approach with caution.
Help is available. The National Suicide Crisis Line is 0800 567 567. This number is free, operates 24/7 and offers counselling in all 11 official languages.
